Being a Mother, Mom, Mommy, Momma, Ma

When I was single and childless, I once read this; "to choose to be a mother is to choose to have your heart walk outside your body forever". I did not understand what that meant. I did not even try to understand.

Skip a few years ahead, my first child was born, and all I could think of was that quote. I remember turning to my mom right after the delivery and asking her how she ever let any of us walk out that door?

To make the decision to become a parent is remarkable, enormous, mind boggling, a game changer, auspicious, and forever. For me, the decision was made for me when I was very young, I always knew I wanted to be a mother, never had a doubt in my mind. I was the kid who started babysitting when I was 11, the kid who volunteered to help out in the KG classes, and the aunt who always wanted to play with her nieces. 

Lucky for me, my husband wanted babies even before I was ready! He wanted one, from the wedding night, I was the one that wanted to wait. After two and half years of marriage our cute son was born, he was angelic, sweet, and a chilled baby. 

Being his mother was the easiest job I ever had! I have many friends that found life with a baby overwhelming and oppressive. They loved their babies, no doubt, but could not adjust to the sleepless nights, the loss of self, the exhaustion of being at the beck and call of a tiny being, the absence of freedom to do as you please, and to love that said tiny human immeasurably and unconditionally. As for me, yes I cannot deny, a small part of me probably felt all of the above, but a bigger part of me found that little dude miraculous and magical. I felt blessed to be chosen to be his mother. His sister on the other hand, many years later to arrive, is another story, magical and miraculous she is, but she made sure that we did not get too complacent in the parenting department.

To choose to be mom, mommy, mother or any other name you want to call it, is indeed massive. However to be chosen to be a mother is short of divine. My road to motherhood has not been paved with roses nor has it always been smooth, I had more bumps along the way then I can mention here (maybe one day in another blog entry).

I wake up every morning thanking my lucky stars for my two miracles. I know numerous beautiful souls deserving to be parents, who have not had that miracle bestowed upon them. I say to them, your time will come, and if not, your purpose here, your journey belongs in another direction. 

Here is what I have learned: Motherhood is the hardest thing you will ever do, the greatest adventure, the craziest ride, the toughest emotional trip, but I would not change it for anything.