What's in a name?

We all are born and given our name by our parents. If we are lucky. Unless we are abandoned and named by our caretakers. Generally speaking, the people that love us the most in the universe, give us a moniker. 

A majority of parents, have an inkling to what the new baby's name should be. A few, wait to see the baby, before making a final decision. Even less then those, will have a disagreement and the baby will remain "the baby" for a while. 

In my culture, a boy may be named after his paternal grandfather and a girl may be named after her paternal grandmother. Thankfully, this custom is slowly dying off. My mother's generation had to put up with a child's name not of their choosing. As my mother tells it, she cried for several weeks after my brother was born and refused to call him by the name chosen for him by tradition. 

In my marriage to be fair and accommodating, we agreed that my husband will name the first child and me the second. It took 8 long years for me to have that opportunity, and by then our 8 year old son wanted to be part of the naming of his sister. Again, because a mom's job is to keep everyone happy. I gave my son three names and he chose one! Our daughter was blissfully unaware of her name for the first year of her life. 

Our little daughter, luckily loves her name! It has become a story of love we tell, about how she got said name. 

Do you like your name? Do you feel you represent that name? Do you wish you had a different name that suits your lifestyle more? Did your parents predetermine who you will become by giving you that name? Keep these questions in mind as you read on, try to find the answers for yourself.

Living in a multicultural city, I come across all kinds of names. Through the years, I have learned names attached to religious beliefs, names based in ethnicity, names I would have never come across had I not lived here. Strange names you ask? Aplenty! Remember, that this is a city that holds 200 different nationalities. Strange is all there is for me. After 25 years here, I am now adapt at guessing certain name roots, and attempt to discover where the person is from based on their name.

I have to admit here, that the more languages you know the funnier it becomes meeting new names. On many occasions, I have had to suppress my giggles, as a name in one language means something totally offensive in another. Judge me if you must, I am sure you have done the same!

Being a curious person, who reads abundantly, and googles amply. I wanted to know "what's in a name'? Does our name hold any relation to who we become? Does it influence our career choices? Our relationships? Successes and failures? Does it hold any water in our existence? Or is it just a name? What difference does it make anyway?

Here is what I came upon, studies that show, your name plays a major role in your reality. It reflects in how society views you and how opportunities are then passed your way. Yes, it sounds incorrect and biased, but it seems to peg you into certain societal boxes.

These studies have shown that teachers react differently, to certain names that they associate with not an intelligent being. This becomes self perpetuating, as that student is not given the challenging work nor the attention to succeed. Resumes sent with equal experience and education were not viewed with equal measurement. The one bearing a certain ethnic sounding name, was given less job interviews and less job opportunities. 

On a personal level, studies showed that certain names were given certain traits in survey after survey. A woman named Lily may be viewed to be more feminine then a woman named Alex. It went down to even if your name determines your physical attributes, does a man named butch become strong and athletic, and a man named Frances become academic and weak?

The reason I sat down to write this blog, is I was reading names of babies in recent history. People that are naming their babies Oak, Rocket, Apple, Dream, Story, River, Boo etc. Besides the bullying and jokes aimed at these children one day. It got me to thinking, what's in a name? How do we live up or down to our name? Do certain names denote certain characteristics?

Here is what I have learned: I, like possibly a large chunk of humanity, unconsciously judge a person by their name. I read in their name, their ethnic and religious roots, I determine certain traits about them, without intending to. I prejudge their traits by their names. Is poppy a free spirit, a tree-hugger, a fighter for animal rights? Is Alexander a powerful decision maker, a determined driven person? My subconscious is analyzing this data in the background. In the foreground, I think I am all about no judgment and no discrimination. Is that true for any of us?