The new ones
The best part of getting married is growing your family! No, I do not mean having kids! I mean the fact that overnight you have a whole new family.
I got engaged and married in less then a year! I lived in one country, my husband- to- be in another, and his family and the wedding in yet another. In all truth, I barely gave a thought to the fact that I am being adopted by a new "clan". It did not enter my "happily ever after" concept that I am now going to have to exist for the rest of my life sharing my sweetheart with those that have known him forever.
The wedding was a dream and our "clans"got along beautifully, they do live in different countries after all! My mom and his mom became fast friends and had a good laugh or two at our account. The siblings shared a joke or two and many delicious meals (we love to eat). For both my husband and I the introduction to a new family was fantastic!
I am sorry to have to burst your bubble, but there will not be any mother in law horror stories here! I have been very lucky that I love my mother in law and she loves me back, I guess after raising 4 sons, I was a nice change. Of course my husband got the best mother in law in the world and he would never dare say otherwise.
After all these years of living with the new ones, and I have had it easier then most. Still, his family is not yours and visa versa. We all have our own traditions and ways of doing things. We all manage our family dynamics differently and we all carry a whole load of family luggage your partner was not privy to.
A tiny example is, I love Christmas and I love the whole season! A whole month of Christmas activities and making a big deal out of every little thing. His family does Christmas too, a family meal on Christmas Eve! They think I am over doing it and I think they are under doing it.
Here is what I have learned: You married the guy and his clan, you could love them madly, but they will not always be what you want them to be. Many an argument is avoided if you learn to compromise. If something is really important for you ( i.e.Christmas) then don't, but if it is something you can live with, then compromise away. You live happier ever after like that!
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