Neutral. Why?
As a family encourager, I encourage and support all types of families. In all shades, shapes, and sizes.
In today's world, any family unit that lives under the same roof looking after each other is a beautiful thing. Even if I do not agree with the choices people make to become that family, I still encourage all types of families. Nuclear family, blended family, step family, grandparent family, single parent family, childless family, same sex family, adoptive family, the list is endless in family structures.
It is also my belief that diversity and differences make our world a tapestry of freedoms and understanding. In our family, we raise our two children to respect all religions, skin color, and cultures. Our children have friends from all around the globe, their social circle looks like the United Nations, where all nationalities are welcome. We celebrate with those friends, their many festivals and religious holidays. We accept all their multifaceted lives, that may be completely diverse to ours, and we make them welcome in our home, always.
I would like to think of myself, as an open minded accepting soul. That is inclusive, compassionate, and empathetic. I, myself, grew up in a school that had 70 different nationalities. A huge community full of multiethnic and multi religious students and teachers. Today, 30 years later, (sshhh don't tell anyone, yes 30), I have loved ones all over the globe and have been lucky enough to stay in touch all this time.
You wonder, why this whole long introduction? and what does the title of my blog today mean? I have been known to say why? to certain things my answer is always why? If a friend says they want to climb the highest peak for example. Or an acquaintance mentions that on their bucket list is jumping from an airplane. Or my teen son wonders if he can ever own a motorcycle. Why? I personally do not see the point and have zero thrill seeking need, not in that manner anyway.
Going back to the word "neutral" and my subject at hand. My comprehension of that word is when someone is impartial or equitable. As in being unbiased. It gives me a feeling of positivity, as in someone that can see both sides maybe of an issue, that can mediate and be a peace keeper in a disagreement. All good, yes?
In my liberal thinking, and thinking out loud with you my hardy readers. I have come up against a brand new (at least to me) concept called "gender neutral". Made me research and ask around what that really means. I came up with all kinds of answers and made me have more questions then answers honestly.
In my research I discovered that my adopted country, Canada, just introduced, the gender neutral "X" on passport applications. That countries such as Malta and Pakistan already have this option. I will reply, why?
We all have a gender. Yes we do. We are born a certain gender, that is physiology. A small percentage of humanity is born with genital ambiguity (1.7% to be exact). Still this has a name its referred to as intersex. As this child grows, he/she can decide to be male or female. That is a gender as well.
Why can't birth certificates instead of removing the gender completely add "intersex" as an option. The majority of humans are born as one or the other gender (98.3% to be exact). Children born as intersex, instead of being made "neutral" and ignored or made to feel ostracized, can be like all other beautiful babies and celebrated not hidden.
People that find themselves later in life, not relating to the gender they were born into, (no genital ambiguity here, just emotional), will still have to find a way to become one gender or the other. Gender neutral means nothing in this circumstance.
A few articles I read, stated that parents today would like to raise their "normal" (the ones born with no genital ambiguity) children, as neither male nor female. That instead of falling for all the stereotypes of blue vs. pink, truck vs. doll, Bob the Builder vs. Angelina Ballerina etc... A child should be raised as everything and they can decide for themselves later what they would like to be. What is wrong in being inherently one or the other? Don't children deviate to what they enjoy to play with? Or in the playground find where their interests lie from a very early age, with no prompting from the adults?
Early years programs in the developed world, ensures that gender stereotypes remain outside the classroom, and yet you see girls wanting to cook or put on make up, and boys wanting to kick a ball or use a drill. Or visa versa. If we raise our children as gender neutral, aren't we right there making the decision for them? Isn't it nature Vs. nurture? Who wins in that argument?
As a mother of two children of different sex, that we gender specified at birth, as to what physiology and nature had offered them in that department. I can tell you that the gender they were born into dictated a vast part of who they are today. My eldest is male and my youngest is female.
As I have stated on many occasions, I am neither a psychologist nor a sociologist or any other scientist that studies the human race. I am simply a "mom", and I can make my own deductions within my limited experience of my children and other children in my stratosphere. Both my kids mixed gender interests (for a better use of a word). My son strolled a doll in a stroller and fed it and my daughter played with firetrucks and light sabers, at some point in their early childhood.
As the years moved them forward, they have both stereotypically went back to the gender they are more comfortable with, the one they were born with. It is my belief, that we did not pigeon hole them into a gender. Their biology did.
Here is what I have learned: By trying to be ultra politically correct with everyone, you will be incorrect with all. Biology is immutable, we are what we are born, even with ambiguity, it has a name. We as parents, have a part to play, to offer all opportunities to both genders, yet let them be who they were born to be. We celebrate our differences in creed, color, culture, religion, sexuality, yet not in gender? Why?
I would like to think of myself, as an open minded accepting soul. That is inclusive, compassionate, and empathetic. I, myself, grew up in a school that had 70 different nationalities. A huge community full of multiethnic and multi religious students and teachers. Today, 30 years later, (sshhh don't tell anyone, yes 30), I have loved ones all over the globe and have been lucky enough to stay in touch all this time.
You wonder, why this whole long introduction? and what does the title of my blog today mean? I have been known to say why? to certain things my answer is always why? If a friend says they want to climb the highest peak for example. Or an acquaintance mentions that on their bucket list is jumping from an airplane. Or my teen son wonders if he can ever own a motorcycle. Why? I personally do not see the point and have zero thrill seeking need, not in that manner anyway.
Going back to the word "neutral" and my subject at hand. My comprehension of that word is when someone is impartial or equitable. As in being unbiased. It gives me a feeling of positivity, as in someone that can see both sides maybe of an issue, that can mediate and be a peace keeper in a disagreement. All good, yes?
In my liberal thinking, and thinking out loud with you my hardy readers. I have come up against a brand new (at least to me) concept called "gender neutral". Made me research and ask around what that really means. I came up with all kinds of answers and made me have more questions then answers honestly.
In my research I discovered that my adopted country, Canada, just introduced, the gender neutral "X" on passport applications. That countries such as Malta and Pakistan already have this option. I will reply, why?
We all have a gender. Yes we do. We are born a certain gender, that is physiology. A small percentage of humanity is born with genital ambiguity (1.7% to be exact). Still this has a name its referred to as intersex. As this child grows, he/she can decide to be male or female. That is a gender as well.
Why can't birth certificates instead of removing the gender completely add "intersex" as an option. The majority of humans are born as one or the other gender (98.3% to be exact). Children born as intersex, instead of being made "neutral" and ignored or made to feel ostracized, can be like all other beautiful babies and celebrated not hidden.
People that find themselves later in life, not relating to the gender they were born into, (no genital ambiguity here, just emotional), will still have to find a way to become one gender or the other. Gender neutral means nothing in this circumstance.
A few articles I read, stated that parents today would like to raise their "normal" (the ones born with no genital ambiguity) children, as neither male nor female. That instead of falling for all the stereotypes of blue vs. pink, truck vs. doll, Bob the Builder vs. Angelina Ballerina etc... A child should be raised as everything and they can decide for themselves later what they would like to be. What is wrong in being inherently one or the other? Don't children deviate to what they enjoy to play with? Or in the playground find where their interests lie from a very early age, with no prompting from the adults?
Early years programs in the developed world, ensures that gender stereotypes remain outside the classroom, and yet you see girls wanting to cook or put on make up, and boys wanting to kick a ball or use a drill. Or visa versa. If we raise our children as gender neutral, aren't we right there making the decision for them? Isn't it nature Vs. nurture? Who wins in that argument?
As a mother of two children of different sex, that we gender specified at birth, as to what physiology and nature had offered them in that department. I can tell you that the gender they were born into dictated a vast part of who they are today. My eldest is male and my youngest is female.
As I have stated on many occasions, I am neither a psychologist nor a sociologist or any other scientist that studies the human race. I am simply a "mom", and I can make my own deductions within my limited experience of my children and other children in my stratosphere. Both my kids mixed gender interests (for a better use of a word). My son strolled a doll in a stroller and fed it and my daughter played with firetrucks and light sabers, at some point in their early childhood.
As the years moved them forward, they have both stereotypically went back to the gender they are more comfortable with, the one they were born with. It is my belief, that we did not pigeon hole them into a gender. Their biology did.
Here is what I have learned: By trying to be ultra politically correct with everyone, you will be incorrect with all. Biology is immutable, we are what we are born, even with ambiguity, it has a name. We as parents, have a part to play, to offer all opportunities to both genders, yet let them be who they were born to be. We celebrate our differences in creed, color, culture, religion, sexuality, yet not in gender? Why?
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